Beyond material comforts, what children often yearn for but rarely receive in our deeply entrenched patriarchal society is their father’s meaningful presence–the unwavering involvement that shapes every step of their growth.

The first tentative steps, the first words uttered, the first day at school, these milestones resonate deeper when both parents are there to witness and support their children.

Mounting research underscores the indispensable role a father’s emotional and physical presence plays in healthy child development. Conversely, children deprived of an actively engaged father—a condition commonly referred to as “fatherlessness”—face significantly higher risks of mental health issues, including anxiety, depression and low self-esteem.

A recent study found that children raised without involved father figures are especially vulnerable to depression in later life, with girls facing an even higher risk. Academically, father-absent children tend to underperform and are more prone to behavioral difficulties.

Socially, the absence of paternal presence can impair a child’s ability to form and sustain healthy relationships. Meanwhile, a 2013 study in Peru revealed that children in fatherless homes were more likely to experience malnutrition and stunted growth.

Studies conducted between 1987 and 2005 consistently found a positive correlation between paternal involvement and children’s overall social competence, initiative, maturity and relational capacity.

These children fared better academically, demonstrated enhanced problem-solving and adaptive skills and displayed greater emotional resilience, creativity and attentiveness in the face of challenges.

Indonesia has been widely cited as one of the countries most affected by the fatherlessness phenomenon. This is driven by a mix of cultural and economic factors: traditional patriarchal parenting norms that place the burden of child-rearing almost entirely on mothers, and economic pressures that force many fathers—and increasingly mothers—into long work hours outside of home.

According to recent data from the National Population and Family Planning Board (BKKBN), 21 percent of Indonesian teenagers report lacking an active father figure. Meanwhile, a 2021 survey by Statistics Indonesia (BPS) found that only about 31 percent of children under the age of five are raised with the active involvement of both parents.

In response, BKKBN launched a campaign encouraging fathers to accompany their children on the first day of school–a symbolic yet insufficient step toward addressing the larger crisis. Real change requires systemic support that enables fathers to be present from the earliest stages of their child’s life.

To foster meaningful paternal involvement, paid paternity leave must be both widely endorsed and rigorously implemented. Scandinavian countries already set a high global benchmark; fathers are often entitled to up to a year or more of paid leave, helping to normalize shared parenting from the earliest stages of a child’s life. Even traditionally patriarchal societies like Japan and South Korea have introduced generous paternity leave policies.

Indonesia, by contrast, lags far behind. The 2023 Manpower Law provides only two days of paid paternity leave. Yet even this minimal policy is poorly implemented. A 2024 JobStreet survey revealed that only 43 percent of companies have adopted the policy, and just 14 percent enforce it.

The government should focus on clear policy enforcement, including clear reporting, auditing mechanisms and public awareness campaigns. Incentives such as tax benefits for compliant companies, coupled with penalties for non-compliance, are essential to drive behavioral change.

Beyond policy, society must provide practical support systems such as parenting classes, community-based fatherhood groups and public campaigns that normalize the idea of emotionally engaged, hands-on fatherhood.

In an era when mothers are increasingly active in the workforce, a balanced parenting model is not just ideal—it is essential. Or else, the risk is not merely fatherlessness, but parentlessness, which is extremely damaging.